Men who don’t grow up!


There are some men who are forever trapped in the boyish mindset of the teens and find it incredibly hard to get out of that even when they grow up in age and enter a professional world. I had such an experience during a personal development workshop that I attended as a part of a training program for my company. In it, we were to do a communications exercise in a group of 4. It so happened that the 3 girls in the training were all in one group with one boy. Now, all the other guys at seeing this, started smirking, making comments on the pitiful condition of that boy in our group. One called us out and said ” Hey! Go easy on him”. Others make comments like “Dude! Hold tight!”. Now, please make a note that these people have at least 4-5 years of work experience and they are supposed to be people managers and yet the amount of professionalism that they show when it comes to dealing with females amidst them is zero. What were the three girls going to do to that boy? Eat Him? Skin him alive? Abuse him? No, in fact what the other guys were doing to him was abuse and at the same time an extremely immature and sexist act. How do you expect from people who tease a colleague for sitting with girls to be mature enough to deal with women in their team and what would their attitude be if they have female subordinates or female bosses?

An excuse can easily be made attempting to cover this behind a joke. “It was just a joke!”, I know for sure that would be the retort. But, I disagree. I believe, that to make such sexist jokes in a professional environment is wrong. You could may be make as many jokes as you like among friends but doing this in an office is uncalled for.
When the foundations of professional behavior are so shaky, how can we expect to ever get sexism removed from workplace?

This has made me realize that sometimes, a joke is not all innocent and we need to point out to such events where college/teenage distasteful and uncomfortable humor, specially regarding females, is carried on into offices and propagated. It creates a sexist and unhealthy work environment.

What’s most surprising and disappointing is that no one pointed this out, everyone either participated in it or shut up, me included. What that indicates is the unapproachability of senior people within companies and openness for suggestions.

But I wanted to highlight this incidence, if only to release my anger.

Yes Please – Amy Poehler


Just finished reading this book by Amy Poehler and it looks like a half hearted attempt. Neither were the incidents entertaining nor were they funny. I am just bound to compare it with Tina Fey’s Bossypants and it was such a good book – genuine, witty and funny. This book has nothing.

I am disappointed as I like Amy’s comedy but the book just does not cut it.

Gone Girl – Gillian Flynn


I finally read the novel by Gillian Flynn. I had been seeing it being hailed for a long time. Eventually, I decided to give in. Took me about two days of intense reading to get through the nearly 600 page novel.

It was interesting. The novel started a bit slow. But I was interested since the psychological exploration which the author does is quite deep and precise. Then there were twists. And the book got very interesting. However, after 400 pages, I started to feel it was a bit longer than needed.
Nonetheless, it was entertaining. Above all, it was the psychological tussle between a couple which I thought was well done. Reading the minds of relationships – that is something which Gillian Flynn has managed to do very well. She said in an interview that her goal was to make couples looks askance and trust me, for a day, I was really affected and upset after reading the book :)

It’s a book worth a read. I would give it 3.5 stars out of 5.

How does being 30 feel?


It felt normal. It was a constant background chatter in my mind but nothing extraordinary happened on the day I turned 30. There was a quite celebration at home and some rumination on my part but by and large, it was like any other birthday I have had. 

Although, to be honest, turning 30 has induced some changes. But these changes had been in the making for some months before I turned 30 actually. I feel grown up.

The most important difference that I have noticed is that of a lack of an urgency. Earlier, everything was urgent for me. I had to urgently achieve something, urgently be somewhere or fulfill a goal. Now, I have perspective. Some things are still urgent, like caring for parents but self related goals are not that urgent anymore. I have more patience and I have a long term outlook on life. If there is something I want and it happens, then good. I will be okay otherwise too. 

 

How to become filthy rich in rising Asia – Mohsin Hamid


I just finished this book by Mohsin Hamid which is a quick read – 179 pages. Took me all of 2.5 hours to get through it.

I picked up the book because I had read Hamid’s reluctant fundamentalist and found it an interesting story which was well told.

This book, however, has left me unmoved and unaffected. The style and the structure of the novel is unique and also attention grabbing for a while but after that the novelty of the style fades as quickly as the strength of the story. It is a decent story, filled with predictable cliched descriptions of poor people living in horrible conditions, defecating openly, having sex when there is no privacy but it falls flat.

It falls flat in the end because there is no character development and there is no motivation or drive ascribed to the central character. We don’t know what fires him or gets him down, we do not know the intensity with which he loves. He is a passive figure and yet he is portrayed as the ambitious underdog who goes on to overachieve. Most of all, the title of the book is completely misguiding.

The language is good. Hamid has a flair for writing, there is no doubt about that but the structure and the storyline of the novel do not serve it very well. For the most part, it seemed to me like a half hearted effort.