I do not know. Honestly. I always used to say and follow that “there is nothing to be sad about…no difficulty too big”. But I have forgotten that and gotten into the mode where “there is nothing to be happy about and even simple things are one hell of a difficulty.” It is ridiculous. If anything, I am better off today than I was a year or two ago. But my woes are that I could have been in a much better situation which is really pointless. Bemoaning something is not going to solve anything. I have mourned the loss enough. It is time to gear up and move on. No second thoughts, no second valuations. Nothing .